Post Rapture update… so wtf happens now people?

Posted 23 May 2011 by

Yesterday per all the billboards around Hollywood we were supposed to have the Rapture. An eighty-nine year old man by the name of Harold Camping who resides here in the great state of California and runs Family Radio, an evangelical station that reaches listeners worldwide, is the one who predicted the world would end yesterday, May 21, 2011 at 6pm.  So 6pm came and went all across the globe and here we all are… unless of course the jokes on me, the world ended, and this is actually hell.

I was at a friend’s birthday yesterday and someone at the party made the comment that if today were their last day they would be happy about it. “Today is a good day to die,” she said.  I thought about that statement for a second; was it a good day to die?  NO, fuck no! I didn’t want to go out like this? Granted it was a fun party and fortunately I was pretty much surrounded with most of the people I care about, but if yesterday the Apocalypse came I would have been fucking pissed!

This whole Rapture business got me thinking.  What if yesterday WERE the last day I was alive? What would I do? How would I choose to do things differently? First off if yesterday were my last day, I would have spent MORE time talking to the incredibly cute guy at the party.  Granted I love my friends and I spent almost all of my time talking to them, but fuck it’s my last day and I talk to my friends all the time. So cute guy, I should have spoken to you more, and then gone and grabbed a glass of Jameson with you down the street… and invited all of our friends to come with us.

If yesterday was the last day I would have called my best friend and told him I how  much I love him and that I think he is squandering his talent! If he wants to go move 3000 miles away and teach little league well then go fucking teach little league and stop calling me and talking about working on this project or that project. Put up or shut up already. I definitely would have called up my ex boyfriend and told him that he’s an ass hole for making me feel bad about so many things and that I am sorry I hurt him, but even sorrier he hurt me. Finally, I would have called my parents and told them how much I loved them and that I’m sorry I have been such a crabby bitch lately.

Other things I would have done include and in no particular order: stripped down and streaked around the park (always wanted to do that), inhaled the helium, hit that fucking pinata a lot harder, had a bigger slice of cake and given everyone around me a really big hug.

So the world did not end… at least not yet. We still have a whole year and a half until December 2012 happens. So what would you do if it were your last day? Well for one thing I am telling you what I am going to do right now… I am going to write that super cute guy a message and ask him out…

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4 Responses to Post Rapture update… so wtf happens now people?

  1. AJ Schwarz says:

    couldn’t agree with you more.
    well put.

  2. admin says:

    Thanks so much for reading and for your response=)!

  3. Valerie says:

    Streaking is overrated. You usually end up with grass in places that are a bit uncomfortable. But I’ll send you a great big virtual hug and say thanks for writing! You rock.

    • Leslie says:

      HA! Perhaps you are right. Thanks so much for reading and commenting Valerie!!=) Appreciate the support

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